Fuller House Is Full of Headaches

I was born in 1988, so needless to say, I grew up watching Full House. I remember loving it as a youngster. It had some comedy and a lot of heart, everything that may appeal to a child . . . and then it ended, and I eventually outgrew it. As of today, I probably haven’t seen more than five minutes of an episode in 15 years. However, it remained a show I held in positive regard due, if nothing else, to nostalgia. As of now, in regards to my childhood and nostalgia, nothing is worth a damn thing!

Before watching Fuller House, I looked at the original series as that touching show from my youth. The new show has destroyed anything positive I ever felt toward it.

Fuller House title

Like many of you, I heard there would be a sequel series of sorts that would follow past characters, and, to be honest, I had no interest. However, as a TV reviewer of shows that have what may be called a “cult following,” I recognized that I may have to give this show a shot and see what’s up.

Big mistake.

Allow me to set the tone: it’s been 20-plus years since we saw the Tanners and all their extended family members, but they all—minus Michelle, of course—have gathered together because Danny (Bob Saget) and Becky (Lori Loughlin) have accepted a new TV gig out of town and thus must sell the Tanner house. Having dealt with her own marriage tragedies, DJ (Candace Cameron Bure) is sad because of all the memories the house holds and is dealing with her own financial issues. Stephanie (Jodi Sweetin) has also returned for the reunion. Oh, and Kimmy (Andrea Barber) is there too. To neatly wrap things up, the three women move into the house to start their own adventures, along the children Kimmy and DJ each have respectively. The house is now fuller than it once was, and why not have a sitcom? Because nothing is sacred.

Where do I even begin in reviewing this thing? First of all, does anyone in my age group remember Full House as a bad show? I didn’t. I remember years ago watching the E! True Hollywood Story episode on the series, in which it was said that the show was never a winner with the critics but always had the numbers to keep it afloat. I remember thinking, “Full House wasn’t supported by the critics? That makes no sense! Everyone watched that show!” Oh, how naïve I was.

Fuller House was literally painful for me to watch. I turned off the first episode twice before I managed to finish it. You may ask me, “Zach, how can a show be that bad?” Let me list some examples of the “humor” we are privileged to receive:

  1. Stephanie Tanner is now a traveling DJ who goes by—wait for it—DJ Tanner! Get it?
  2. Stephanie has just come from England and due to her stay is sporting an accent, only for that accent to be broken by an event that causes her to utter her catch phrase, “How rude!” Then it is gone as if by magic.
  3. To explain the absence of Michelle (Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen), it is said she is in New York managing her fashion empire—you know, like in real life! But that’s not the end of that joke: the line is followed by the entire cast breaking the fourth wall and staring straight at the audience as if to say, “See what we did there?”
  4. DJ has a son who is a mini Danny in regards to his obsessive cleaning tendencies.

Folks, these (and more) are all in just the first episode. You may now be asking, “Well, what about the rest of the season?” I confess: I couldn’t go any further. I actually wrote my editor, asking if I really needed to watch the whole season in order to review the show, because I honestly did not think my sanity could handle such a blow. Bless her heart, she said I could do what I wanted. I warn you all, this show is just God awful—stay away from it at all costs.

Now, it has been shown that some people not only like the show but love it, and as a result Netflix has even renewed it for a second season, How do I respond to that? Simple: these people are blinded by the feeling of nostalgia from a show they loved as children. Not me, though. I once was blind, and now I see . . . evil, thy name is Fuller House. On the plus side, Candace Cameron Bure and Jodie Sweetin look fantastic.

In short: is it good? It is a disaster! Should you watch it? You should run from it!


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